After more than a year and a half of over-analyzing and agonizing over James’ reluctance to speak, I quickly learned that James had been studying language very carefully for quite some time. When he finally broke his silence it became quite apparent that he was a clever wordsmith, carefully stringing together groups of words to form entire sentences; and he was funny.
“James, did you do that on purpose?” I would ask.
“No,” he would reply, “I did it by my stink.”
“By my stink. I did not mean it. By my stink.”
“By your stink? What does that mean, James?”
“It stinks I did it wrong on accident.”
Can’t argue with that reasoning. I also couldn’t correct him because it was ridiculously cute.
Three-year-old James used to love to watch Monster Truck racing on television with his dad. One of his favorite trucks was named Maximum Destruction. James preferred to call him “Maxi-Home Destruction.”
“Why is he called Maxi-Home Destruction, James?” I would ask.
“He would crush our home if he tried to park in the driveway.”
James is also quite competitive.
One day I was gardening in the back yard and my husband was testing the new sprinkler system he had just installed. Just as the water stream shut off I looked up from pulling weeds to see James’ bare bottom across the yard.
Upon closer inspection I noticed that James had pulled down his pants and was peeing into my herb garden, so I shouted, “What are you doing, James?”
James shouted back, “I’m winning!”
“Winning what?” I asked.
“The sprinkler peed on me so I am peeing back and I am winning!”
When I stopped laughing I instructed my husband to run the sprinklers in the herb garden for a few extra minutes that evening.
Journal entry: Three year olds are a constant source of entertainment. James “sprinkled” in the garden today to teach the sprinkler a lesson. You can’t make this stuff up.